Day...uhhh....

A picture of me in Meade, Kansas with the motel owner's cat who came to visit our room.

I've been sitting at home for, probably over a week now. I'd really like for that guy offering me a job to have a spare moment. I'm sure he will soon, he does need a new assistant eventually after all. I suppose I shouldn't be impatient, most people with my age and talents (or lack there of) get job offers this good. But since quitting my money-eating career as a commission only pre-sales consultant, I have had nothing to do. More money in the bank, but nothing to do. Honestly I'd rather spend my days of precious year 21 sitting in the basement then showing up for work to not get paid. At least sitting at home is my choice. Drive down to Colorado Springs every week and not get paid for it? No thanks, my time is a little bit more valuable than that.  

Anyway, I am tired of being at home and just want to move on to the next stage of things already. My time is a little bit too valuable to sit in the basement, my choice or not (and thank goodness it is a choice!!), but I have nothing to do. Barely any friends at all, actually, I have 1 (that I can actually see). And I am eternally grateful to have her (Naruto hating or not... though the fact that she does voictrously hate Naruto is a little bit soul crushing every time I hear it....). But more people would be nice. Where do you find people if you don't go to school? Craigslist? That's kind of pathetic and... dangerous and weird.

Anyway, I don't know how many days it's been since I haven't had a job. Luckily, it is not troublesome to not have a job still living at home. I just ate dinner for free and didn't even have to cook, but as lovely as that is I would like to get on with moving out and life in general. I think moving to Meade, Kansas would be a good thing. Something has always felt wrong with the consumer life style, but up until I found Mr. Money Mustache, a blogger who lives right here in Colorado, I thought that the only way to escape would be to live on an island. Turns out, you escape the system by using it differently than everyone else. Meade, Kansas is a tiny, flat town with giant roads perfect for never, ever using a car. I'm hoping there is a farmers market because the produce in the tiny little grocery store did not look or smell good... like, at all.... other than that, though, it is away from giant shopping malls and starbucks. As much as I love those things, they are not healthy for many different reasons and their addiction I wish to break. Because honestly, I have a lot of beautiful cloths now, I won't be needing any more for years to come.

Trying to figure out...

I'm trying to figure out how I can make myself realize when I only like something for monetary reasons. I got all excited about making money from a blog that I made a new one here on blogger, come to find out that you pretty much have to pay for hosting if you hope to make any sort of profit, and that it takes years to build. Well, I knew it would take several years... but the risk of it being unsuccessful is not worth what that would cost me over that time period.

But here's the thing...  I was going to make it about art projects done by a person with no real artistic talent (me) and I thought that will be fun and interesting! And it does sound fun and interesting... until I have to realize that it won't make me any money any time soon, and just like that, all motivation/desire gone. I couldn't tell that that was the only reason, I mean I knew it was a reason, but I thought I wanted the blog for the blog, too.

I even imagined having that blog without it making (or costing) any money and I couldn't tell that I didn't really want it. I thought that worked... scary, I've always made purchasing decisions based on imagining scenarios like that. I guess that doesn't work... looks like I'll have to use what I know about myself, and cold hard logic. We'll try it that way, see how things change. Either way, I really want to commit to this frugal lifestyle (presumably only because of the monetary gains and early retirement, if no such promises could be made, well, I don't think anybody would be frugal then!)

Actually, after just now looking back on an old post about a life scenario, I wanted an electric car for the monetary gains of not having to buy gas. Now that I have a different plan that I very much hope doesn't fade out (gulp, biking to close places) I no longer want that car at all, pretty as it may be. Nope, I think my little red car will get me plenty far for years to come, especially if that biking thing catches on. If it does, I get to buy a new $300 bike! It will be so much fun. And will be pocket change compared to how much I'll have saved in gas. 

Hmm... we should post a fun picture...

 

 Freakin' Epic.

Money, money, money...

I just found a blog that tells you how to retire at 30.

No gimmicks, though I have been known to trust in things rather quickly, lolz. David from Raptitude led me to it, so I'm going to say that this one is a safe bet.

This was part of a message I was going to send to Mr. Money Mustache. Yes, I already sent him a contact lolz. 

"My main concern is losing out on investments, but I'm hoping if I learn enough about them then I won't have to worry about it. I also don't want to live in low-income houses because of all the dangerous riff raff those areas attract. A scrawny girl riding in a place like that on her bike.... not a good combination lolz."

I left this part out because I didn't want to bog him down with little details. I decided to tell him that I still had lots of questions, but that I'm sure they would be answered if I just look around a bit.

So, I guess I'll see what happens. I hope I can get my spending habits under control!!

Here's one of my favorite bands singing about this very thing, lolz.

Job

I avoided going to Idaho with a smoker today. I am a little sad because now I am stuck at the house, but hopefully this other job works out and I can move out. Yes, the prospect of moving out is within my grasp. I am excited. I really hope I can make some money!

Oh well, until I get a life, I still have a second one to keep me entertained.

I don't know what to do.

There may be a job for me in Mead, Kansas. Away from everyone and everything I've ever known. The things aren't that important, I like change. But an image pops into my head every time I think about it.... Megan's parties. I have only been to a few, I can't go to many it seems because this salesmen job is keeping me out of town every weekend. There is drinking, hookah, and lots of interesting people to talk to. I first went to her party on new years, where I didn't drink. But I sure met some cool people.

And most importantly, Megan is my life long friend. I've known her for longer than some of my family members. She and I are determined to always keep in touch. However, being so far away would be hard. I was just getting excited about going to these parties, having a drink or a puff, and getting to know these interesting people.

But really... should I pass up a job opportunity for parties? Well, I'm 21. I'm right at the party age (not that I'm much of a party hard girl). No matter what I do, I feel like I'm missing something important. I tried to ask myself which I'd remember more years from now... moving out or partying with good friends. Really, I can't decide. Obviously the job thing sounds like the better option. But I'm not worried about missing out of drinking, or being cool or whatever they portray in those teen movies that people think people worry about (maybe they do?). I don't know... I want to be social and not look back and see nothing cool or fun about my young adult years. I also don't want to see walmart and parties all the time. I want both. I want to good job and I want to see Megan and get to know those interesting people. Maybe something will happen that will clear all of this up soon. But right now, Idaho, ho!

Crazy

It's amazing.

All I did was decide that I wanted life to be different. After graduating Job Corps, I didn't want to go back to the basement. I wanted to travel, and I wanted a job that wasn't retail or food. ANYTHING pretty much but retail or food. So, thanks to my brother, I got a job with a traveling portrait company. And although I am not happy with the company (at first I loved the company, everyone seemed so nice and they talked a lot about self improvement stuff... then I realized that as a contracted employee, it is illegal for them to be taking %50 of my commission (which is my only pay) but they do because they consider us "part of the company" but apparently not part of it enough for benefits) it is a HELL of a lot better than walmart or taco bell, two places, and places similar, which I REFUSE to be apart of, unless in cases of desperation. But, here I am in a little horror movie town in Kansas with a lady, who I drove there with in my new car.

When I was little, I was determined that my first car would be red. Funny thing is, I got this car because the neighbors happened to be selling it and mom and daddy happened to decide to buy it for me. It wasn't until later that Megan reminded me that I had always said that my first car would be red. Coincidence? Maybe... but there seem to be a lot of coincidences like that in my life. As a kid, I wanted to move to the country to get real horses, but not so far that I wouldn't be able to see my friends. I wanted my room walls painted, I wanted posters, I wanted a skateboard, I wanted a family car that had sliding doors and a dvd player... and later on in life I wanted military school that could somehow get me a high school diploma, and simultaneously wanted to get out of the house, at least for a while. Now, with the descriptions of the latest desired happenings above, I will tell you that every last one of these things have come true. Maybe I wanted a lot of other things that have not come true, and I just don't remember them because I didn't get them. I'm sure that has happened, but considering just some of the things that HAVE happened, I am thinking of coming to the conclusion that something strange is going on. I don't know if it's God, the law of attraction, or something else. But I am really thinking that it is, in fact, something.

UPdaTe

Well, I moved from bay 3 to bay 6 in an effort to get away from Kayla. Unfortunately, Kayla moved out that very same day and I got stuck in one of the worst bays I've ever lived in. Lexy is bay leader, and she has every bad leader quality and lacks every good one. She's naggy, she can't communicate very well and has NO  listening skills WHAT SO EVER. I have to ask the same question 6 times to get any kind of answer. And then as much as she hounds us to follow the rules to a t, she breaks several herself.

Anyway, Cody and I "broke up" for like, 4 days but it didn't last after he decided to not move to california. and he knows some people who are trying to start a game design company right here in colorado, so maybe he can do what he wants to do after all. I honestly don't count that time as a break up, we didn't really act like we were broken up that much.

That is about all the updates. Oh yeah, I finished trade, high school, and am getting ready to graduate March 28th. I am done with everything and could leave anytime but I made a commitment to Mrs. Gregory for her play. I love Mrs. Gregory too much to run out on her after saying I would do this.

That is about all the is new. I guess that's a lot, actually. I finally found a way to learn math through the Khan Academy. It is an amazing website. So, now I'm getting ready to go full time trade (bleck) and hope they will just let me study, but as always, Mr. Keller insists I learn boring, uninteresting stuff about buildings.