Some more help replies I'm proud of, lolz.
The first thing, about everyone leaning on you but you having no one… have you ever tried leaning on them? That’s what friends are for… and if they don’t let you lean on them than they’re not great friends. Every relationship must be win-win, or else you must drop the people from your life and never look back.
About your looks… attractive people have the same self-esteem problems that anyone does. Like money, attractiveness is relative and if you’re hotter than your friends, at that stage you start comparing yourself to people in the media, the ones that that have had the living guts Photoshopped out of them.
In other words, they’ve adjusted to the experience of being attractive the same as our high income earners have adjusted to having money; they just pick other flaws to worry about. Sure, if you used the magical artifact up there to become Angelina Jolie tomorrow, you’d notice the difference over how you’re treated now. But if you were born Angelina Jolie, you’d have no way of grasping it, the same as right now you don’t realize what it’s like to live life with some kind of horrible deformity.
You know how when the hot girl at the bar tells an unfunny joke, all the guys laugh anyway? Or when the office stud makes a mistake, the female boss laughs it off?
Attractive people live in a world where most feedback they get is bull. The compliments mean nothing–they’ve learned that’s just the sound people make when they walk by. That’s why studies show they tend to dismiss the genuine compliments they get in other areas (their work, personality, sense of humor, creativity) because it gets lumped in with the same counterfeit flattery they’ve been getting their whole lives.
I also know you want a boyfriend, but seriously don’t worry about it. You just have to understand that the goal of each desire is to bring happiness. So each time you find yourself wanting something… ask yourself if it will really make you happy, or just bring you pleasure. You must understand the difference between happiness and pleasure. Pleasure cannot be sustained beyond the activity or object, happiness can. It is also important to understand that “happiness” is something that can be pursued and obtained. Let me tell you, it is not. No matter what life situation you’re in (provided it’s not something extremely horrible like being chained in a kidnappers basement or starving to death Africa) the amount of good days and bad days you have will not change. Our brains are programmed to want more more more because that’s how we as animals in the wild survived. But we’re not in the wild anymore, we can not focus on thriving instead of just surviving. So no matter what goal you reach, it’ll never be enough.
So how, then, do we be over all happy? It relies %100 and I MEAN %100 on attitude. You feel badly about not having a boyfriend or not being white because that is how you CHOOSE to think of it. But if you realize that, if you be patent and know that a great man will come along one day, you’ll be content and not worry about it. You’ll know that your life would not improve in any way if you had white skin. In fact, you’d be laying in the sun all day trying to be tan. White is not hot, that’s why we have to work at being darker unlike some other lucky people (like Hispanics, for example) who are born that way.
Dose any of that make sense?
If you go to a department store, the women behind the counters will give you a make over and tell you exactly what you need. Otherwise, go to the grocery store and discreetly open the bottle and rub some on your wrist.. if it matches then it’s close enough. That’s what a lot of women do since department stores are more expensive =P lolz.
OK, make sure you go on a Wednesday morning if at all possible. That is when there will be the least amount of people and therefore the most amount time for them to pay attention to you. Avoid going later in the day, the closer to closing time the worse because they’ll be scrambling to make their daily sales quota and pressure you into buying things, so you’ll probably end up spending more than you need too. Make sure you tell them weather or not you’re really planning on buying today, they’ll like that a lot because there’s almost nothing worse than spending time and resources on someone only to find out they’re not serious, so it’ll be a nice thing to do to just take that little worry away from them, like a good deed. All right! That’s about all you need to know, good luck and have fun!
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